Coral Thede at XBKLive : Authenticity on Display
Sarah Bean sings and plays Ukulele on Saturday, October 22nd at xBkLive.
As someone who has lived in Des Moines for just over a year, there are a handful of things that I have grown to regard as the epitome of DesMoinesness. Hello Marjorie, the sculpture park, and lunch in the east village all come to mind, though I have been surprised to hear that for some people, Coral Thede is not on this list. Comedian, singer, master at manifesting, I see Coral’s name about town frequently. She ran a landmark show Tits Up at Teehee’s in the Western Gateway, she was featured in the Des Moines Story Tellers Project. She’s traveled around the world, performed all over the country, and she’s got a large arsenal of stories and experiences to share.
I first brushed shoulders with her in the lobby of the Surety Hotel, where the contributors at Des Moines Girl were celebrating their first anniversary. I can’t recall how; but my conversation with Coral became an impromptu life coaching session. We talked about being creatives, how we fit into the Des Moines scene as creators, and what it means to grow as people take notice of our work. Coral’s ability to lean into life’s uncertainties and embrace them is, I think, key to what has made her popular. I’ve been a fan ever since.
I was a fan even before I knew her full story- one that I will let you read in her own words, here. To summarize, she lost her father in early 2018 and found herself awash in a sea of grief that carried her into the fall of that year. It was then that she learned Pantone’s 2019 Color-of-the-Year was to be Living Coral. Taking this as a sign, she resolved to travel the world, and after seeing 13 countries, finding a temporary home in Paris, she found herself back home in Iowa, which she calls the France of the Midwest.
Remind me to steal that line, “France of the Midwest.”
I’ll let you in on a secret though, I am a little biased. You see there is something very relatable about Coral to me. We’re both redheads known for our boisterous personality and an ability to lean into the awkwardness of life. Coral and I both seem to be people that, for better or worse, have to resolved to enjoy life even if we must bear the weight of grief within us. We’ve just found ourselves expressing it in different ways- she’s on a stage, or seeing the world, and I’m waxing poetic behind this wall of text.
The event was advertised by the venue, xBk live with this text.
In this one-night-only event, Coral invites you for an intimate evening of music, manifestation and inspiration. Part song, part stand-up, in her first solo show, she’ll string it all together in a way only a spirited storyteller can, wading through heartache and humor as she recounts finding joy amid loss. In her own words, she’s not here to make light of the darkness - but to see the light through it. And by the end of the show, chances are high that you’ll feel inspired to do the same.
THAT Night, AT XBK LIVE
A growth mindset can become contagious. From the show I saw on October 22nd, it seems that Coral has a way of attracting other people with the same vibrant and creative energy that she has. If you’ll pardon the expression, I see that she has a reef. In the spirit of being “literally living Coral” she’s here to carpe diem, and others can grow alongside her. Once you understand this, you can begin to understand what I witnessed at xbkLive that week. Coral introduced us to a number of endearing yet talented personalities, each bookended with a story of her own. She was introduced by Business Record’s 2022 40 under 40 nominee Billy “B.WELL” Weathers, known for his work in developing the central Iowa community in a multitude of disciplines, and a musician as well.
When she appeared on the stage in her trademark sparkly heeled boots, she told us stories. In one she told us of teenage Coral sitting on the counter of a Kum and Go with a guitar. Just as I was pondering the progression from anxious teenager performing Kum-&-Go-cabaret to this stage- she merged the two with the introduction of Sarah Bean. “I can remember being that teenager on the counter”, she remarked, and passed the torch to a young performer.
Sarah Bean
Ukulele in tow, 15-year-old Sarah Bean took the stage, and for a moment we were all teenagers again. I put on HDSM’s story that night that there are few things more relatable than being a teenager. We’ve all been through that phase, regardless of what we wore or the music we liked at the time, we’ve all been those scared kids figuring things out for the first time. We were all emotional and anxious while the whirlwind of adulthood approached. Belting out these raw emotions, alone, while still a teenager on a stage in front of strangers is a genuine act of bravery to be celebrated. As a fellow member of the queer community, I couldn’t help but feel like I was celebrating an old friend’s success. We got to watch Sarah settle into this stage, then slowly realize they were really rocking it. They gleefully warbled “Here I go again, here I go again, here I go again, making everything all about me, everything is all about me”. All of the thrill of being that terrified teen was so genuinely portrayed that you could feel it, even as I was sitting up in the balcony.
Abbie Sawyer
This came in perfect contrast with the next act, the kind of velvety voice that can only come from years of singing. Abbie Sawyer, Coral’s 2nd act, featured the same standard of genuine, intimate song writing, though shown through a more mature lens. I had never seen or heard of Abbie before, if I’m honest, but I can see in hindsight why Little Village Magazine called her voice “unforgettable”. Her lyrics again touched on the emotions of daily life, one song that I really enjoyed told of the woes of experiencing seasonal depression “and it’s only October”. I was most entranced, though, by a song called Feel Rich. Her soulful crooning filled the room as she remarked on decadent little experiences that made her life feel full. I couldn’t help but notice that the attitude of Feel Rich displayed the same kind of attitude that I talk about here on Hidden Des Moines. These were little romantic things like enjoying coffee, 700 thread-count sheets, having long hair, Friday nights, all enumerated in song. She finished this and left me with food for thought. See, this is a song that Abbie has performed for years, and she remarked about how it’s interesting to see how what makes her “feel rich” has changed with time. Abbie Sawyer, for example, does not currently have long hair. I left wondering how I might change with time, and how it will be interesting to have logged experiences in the format of this blog just like her song.
Coral and Lily Detaeye
Lastly, it was time for Coral to claim the stage as her own. She was accompanied by Lily DeTaeye, a powerful songstress in her own right, though the focus was now on Coral. I later learned that her stage decor and wardrobe were last minute decisions, thrown together items collected from her home. She spoke about this on Instagram,
It wasn't until after soundcheck that I decided to decorate the stage. Ran home, grabbed a rug, a half disco ball and my grandma's old suitcase. Decided to scrap the fancy dress and wear what was comfortable aka the standard fall fit. Literally painted my nails backstage while we did reiki and listened to Celtic music. Shook off my show shoes and played barefoot like I've always wanted to.
An excellent choice, and as an audience member I had no idea. I thought this played-down attitude for this evening was meant to be part of the act. In turn, the set that Coral had created simply wrapped the evening in a ribbon labeled “authentic and genuine”. Standing, now barefoot, on a rug from her own home, she finally sang. And damn, Coral can sing. I’m a redhead, so I’m allowed to make this pun. She’d be singing directly from her soul if she weren’t a ginger. If you get a chance to see Coral Thede sing live, do not hesitate to. When she’s wearing a “comedian-hat” Coral has a way of breaking down barriers to relate to an audience, so it should not have come as a shock that she could sing with such genuine emotion. It was as if we were watching a dramatic emotional transformation happen right before our eyes, and we were. Again from her Instagram,
I feel like I spent the last four years holding my breath.
Been holding on too tight to who’s gone and what’s gone and who or what might go next. It’s exhausting to live life without an exhale.
This show made me feel like I could breathe again.
Like I could finally and fully see who and what was right in front of me. My guitar. My people. My voice.
The evening wrapped with an encore from Coral, singing whatever song she happened to know while the audience sang along.
Mr Hidden and Living Coral
I left this show with a poignant feeling of growth, fear, inspiration, and gratitude. Seeing someone to which I can so closely relate display such raw emotion about their journey in life, but particularly with grief, was eye opening. I am also someone who seeks to be a light for others, so it is refreshing when I have an experience with someone else who can light the way for me.
With regard to my own work, the persona of Mr. Hidden is eloquently designed to be relatable but also to avoid having to talk about my personal life. This is where Coral and I differ. The truth is that the “live like the main character” attitude I portray here is a way of coping with some complex feelings and situations in my life. Finding myself in Des Moines was not unlike Coral finding herself in Paris. I’ll tell the story in full when the time is right. For now, I want you to know that if something makes you feel inspired, or if something feels right, follow that thread. You never know where it might lead you.
Follow Coral Thede
xBkLive is an independent venue situated in the Drake Neighborhood. The venue features a diverse set of acts, both local and national. As a venue with a 250 person cap, it is an intimate setting that allows performers to get up-close-and-personal with their audiences. All of the staff I encountered here were friendly and personable. This is a place one can go to let loose, experience some great performances, and broaden their horizons.
I attended Coral’s show in partnership with xBkLive and the Des Moines Hummingbirds.